Because what the world really needs is more of Trump’s brilliant ideas, he’s decided to save the Afrikaners, a white minority in South Africa, from the land expropriation law that’s totally not about addressing decades of apartheid and white minority rule. I mean, who needs to address historical injustices when you can just resettle a bunch of white people in the U.S. and call it a day?
And let’s be real, the fact that Elon Musk is backing this plan is just a total coincidence and not at all related to his Starlink venture failing to win approval in South Africa. I’m sure it has nothing to do with his own personal interests and everything to do with his deep concern for the Afrikaners. But hey, who needs facts when you have feelings, right?
But wait, it gets better – Trump’s order also directed Secretary of State (not actually Marco Rubio, by the way) and Secretary of Homeland Security (not actually Kristi Noem) to provide humanitarian assistance to Afrikaners, because apparently, they’re the real victims here. And if you’re wondering what kind of humanitarian assistance they might need, well, let’s just say it’s probably not books on land reform or anything. Maybe they just need some good old-fashioned handouts and a free pass to the U.S.?
And can we talk about how ridiculous it is that Trump and Musk are claiming the land expropriation law is unfairly seizing property from white landowners? I mean, come on, white farmers own about 75 percent of the country’s land, and the government hasn’t even confiscated any land yet. But hey, facts are overrated, and feeling like you’re being persecuted is all that matters, right? But seriously, have you seen the actual numbers on land ownership in South Africa? It’s like, wow, white people have had their foot on the throat of the Black majority for centuries, and now they’re playing the victim card?
But what really takes the cake is that Trump and Musk are using this as an excuse to bash South Africa and cut funding for aid. I mean, because what’s a little racism and colonialism when you can just profit off of it? And hey, if you’re looking for a good book on colonialism, I’ve got just the thing. But seriously, can we please just address the actual issues at hand instead of just making up feel-good stories about white people being oppressed?
And did I mention that Afrikaners make up about 2.7 million of South Africa’s 62 million people? Yeah, that’s a real minority, and I’m sure they’re just dying to be resettled in the U.S. where they can finally experience the freedom and opportunity they’ve been denied in South Africa. But hey, who needs facts when you have emotions, right? And if you’re feeling emotional about this whole situation, maybe you should just read a self-care book or something.
But in all seriousness, this whole situation is just a prime example of how white supremacy and colonialism work. I mean, it’s not like the land expropriation law is actually about addressing historical injustices or anything. Nope, it’s just about whites being oppressed and needing to be saved by Trump and Musk. But hey, at least we can all agree that this is a totally legitimate use of executive power, right? Right?
And on a completely unrelated note, has anyone tried these coffee mugs? They’re amazing. But anyway, back to the topic at hand – Trump, Musk, and their brilliant plan to resettle Afrikaners in the U.S. Because what could possibly go wrong with that, right? Maybe they’ll all just live happily ever after in their new white supremacist paradise. But hey, a girl can dream, right?
But in all seriousness (again), this whole situation is just a massive distraction from the actual issues at hand. I mean, instead of addressing the historical injustices faced by the Black majority in South Africa, we’re just going to ignore all that and focus on white people’s feelings. Because that’s exactly what the world needs more of – white people’s feelings being catered to. But hey, at least we can all agree that this is a great use of resources, right? Maybe we can all just chip in and buy them a one-way ticket to Mars or something.
And finally, can we please just talk about how absurd it is that Trump and Musk are claiming to be champions of justice when it comes to the Afrikaners? I mean, come on, these are the same people who have supported cutting funding for aid to South Africa. But hey, at least they’re consistent, right? Maybe they’ll all just live happily ever after in their white supremacist fantasy land. But hey, a girl can dream, right?