I’m just going to say it: politicians are always saying something dramatic, and this time it’s Bernie Sanders claiming these are the scariest times in his life. And I’m like, really? Because I’ve been alive for a while now, and I think I’ve seen some pretty scary stuff too.
But apparently, according to CNN, Sanders is really concerned about the state of the world. I mean, who isn’t, right? It’s not like we’re all just walking around thinking everything is fine and dandy. (Although, if you are, please let me know what you’re drinking, because I want some of that optimism.)
And then I started thinking, what’s the most terrifying thing that’s happened recently? Is it the climate change crisis? Because, let’s be real, that’s some scary stuff. I mean, have you seen those National Geographic pictures of melting glaciers? It’s like, hello, we’re all doomed.
I guess what I’m trying to say is, I’m not entirely sure what Sanders is referring to when he says these are the scariest times in his life. Is it the economic inequality? The pandemic? The fact that we’re all just existing in a world that’s just a little bit crazy? (By the way, have you ever read the Urban Dictionary definition of “existing”? It’s like, woah.)
But in all seriousness, I think we can all agree that these are, in fact, some pretty scary times. I mean, have you seen the movies they’re making these days? It’s all just a bunch of apocalyptic this and zombie that. It’s like, hello, can’t we just have a nice, happy movie for once?
Anyway, I guess what I’m trying to say is, I’m a little skeptical of Sanders’ claim. I mean, has he seen the history books? There have been some pretty scary times in the past, if you know what I mean. (Although, if you don’t know what I mean, just Google it.) But hey, maybe I’m just not taking this seriously enough. Maybe I should be more concerned about the politics and less concerned about the memes. (Just kidding, memes are the best.)
And can we talk about how politics is just, like, so boring sometimes? I mean, I’d rather watch paint dry than listen to a congressional hearing. But hey, someone’s gotta do it, right? Maybe I’ll just caffeinate myself and get through it that way.
But in all seriousness, I think Sanders has a point. These are scary times, and we should be taking them seriously. But at the same time, can’t we just, like, take a deep breath and try to stay calm? I mean, panicking isn’t going to help anyone, right? (Unless you’re preparing for the apocalypse, in which case, carry on.)
And finally, can we talk about how social media is just, like, the worst? I mean, it’s just a bunch of people yelling at each other and sharing memes. Can’t we all just, like, get along? (Just kidding, that’s never going to happen.) But hey, at least we can all laugh about it, right?