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Videos of Bernie Sanders’ Large Midwest Rallies Take Off Online, Mostly Because People Thought He Was Giving Away Free Cheese
Are we seriously living in a world where billionaires like Elon Musk get to decide how our government is run? It's like something out of a bad science fiction novel (you can check out some similar themed books on Amazon). And don't even get me started on Senator Bernie Sanders, who's been traveling around the country, giving speeches and rallies, trying to "take on the oligarchy" - as if that's even possible in today's political…
What Is the Alien Enemies Act: Because Your In-Laws Weren’t Enough of an Invasion
Wait, what's going on here? Donald Trump, the President of the United States, has decided to invoke a 227-year-old wartime law to help carry out mass detainments and deportations. Because, you know, that's exactly what we need - more archaic laws being used to justify questionable actions. I mean, who needs due process and equal protection when we've got the Alien Enemies Act of 1798 to fall back on? And let's be real, this law…
Breaking: White House Suddenly Remembers to Invoke Alien Enemies Act After Tren De Aragua’s Salsa-Taco Truck Armada Invades, Demands Unlimited Guac
And so, it begins - the latest episode in the never-ending saga of terrorism and narcoterrorism (because, you know, narco-terrorism is a thing now). The President of the United States has issued a proclamation declaring Tren de Aragua (TdA) a Foreign Terrorist Organization. But, let's get real, who hasn't been deemed a terrorist these days? I mean, have you seen the prices of avocados lately? Talk about a threat to national security. Apparently, TdA has…
Vance Couple Brings Entire Venue to Tears, But Not Because of the Music: Attendance of JD Vance and Wife Somehow Manages to Ruin Good Time for Thousands
I'm just so excited to talk about this - JD Vance and Usha Vance getting booed at a concert, because, you know, that's exactly what they needed, more attention. And, can we just take a moment to appreciate the fact that they were at the Kennedy Center, a place that's supposed to be all about class and sophistication, but now it's just a hot mess, thanks to Donald Trump and his antics. But, let's get…
‘Clearly, None of You Have Couches or Netflix Subscriptions’
And so, it begins - the never-ending saga of politicians making tone-deaf comments that leave us scratching our heads (what's new, right?). But, I mean, who doesn't love a good controversy to spice up their morning coffee? Apparently, Vice President JD Vance thinks it's a great idea to ridicule protesters, asking them if they don't have jobs (um, hello, have you seen the state of the economy lately?). I guess that's one way to tackle…
In Iowa, Tim Walz Reveals Democrats’ Bold New Strategy: Yelling ‘Do Something!’ Really Loudly Until Something Happens
Can you believe it? Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz is on a mission to save the world, or at least, to save the Democrats from themselves. And, of course, he's starting in Iowa, because, why not? (I mean, who needs a beach vacation when you can go to Iowa, right?) Anyway, Walz is traveling around, holding town halls, and listening to people's concerns, which is more than some Republicans can say. But, let's get real, this…
MAGA Martyr Jesse Watters Victims Himself After DOGE Cuts Leave Him Penniless and Forced to Eat Non-Organic Avocado Toast
And, of course, because the universe loves a good joke, Fox News host Jesse Watters is now bemoaning the DOGE cuts that are impacting him personally - you know, the same cuts he's been promoting on his show (because hypocrisy is just a word, right?). But let's get this straight: Watters is only upset because his sister works at Johns Hopkins University, which just so happens to be one of the many institutions affected by…
‘He’s Underwater and So Are His Ego and Hairpiece: Fox News Host Tries to Stay Afloat with Latest Trump Approval Polling’
I am just sodone with the state of politics in this country, you know? Donald Trump is just, like, the worst, and his approval ratings are just a total joke. I mean, a Fox News host (lol, okay) said he's "underwater on everything" and honestly, who can even argue with that? And then there's this Quinnipiac poll that's just, like, totally damning - 53 percent of voters disapprove of Trump's performance, which, wow, what a…
Trump’s Approval Rating Breaks Record for Most Consecutive Days Spent at Bottom of Ocean
I am just going to rewrite this in a satirical tone, because, why not? It's not like I have anything better to do, like baking a cake or something. But let's talk about President Donald Trump's approval rating, because it's just so fascinating (not). Apparently, it's taken a hit, and he's now in negative territory, with more people disapproving of him than approving. Wow, what a shock! And, of course, this is a big deal,…
Chuck Edwards’ Town Hall Erupts in Shocking Display of Sanity, Participants Somehow Resist Urge to Yell at Clouds About DOGE
Can you believe this? Republican Rep. Chuck Edwards held a town hall in Asheville, North Carolina, and it was a complete disaster. I mean, who doesn't love a good trainwreck, right? The constituents were furious about DOGE (apparently, that's a thing now), and they barely let the congressman get a word in edgewise. It was like a scene from a bad comedy movie. And let's talk about Edwards himself. He's a mild-mannered, bespectacled guy with…