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Poll: Americans Shocked to Discover Trump Still Can’t Do Anything Right, Nation Somehow Still Standing
I'm just so done with President Trump and his whole "mandate" thing - can't he just get over himself already? (I mean, I know, I know, it's not like he's going to suddenly develop a sense of humility or anything). Anyway, according to NPR, he's used the word "mandate" more than 50 times in public appearances and on social media since Election Day - yeah, because nothing says "mandate" like repeatedly telling people you have…
Elon Musk’s $1 Million Giveaway Exposed: Turns Out Winner Was Just His Cousin Dave from Accounting
I'm just so excited to talk about Elon Musk's latest stunt, because, you know, giving away $1 million to random people is totally not a way to buy votes or influence elections (or is it?). But let's get real, folks, this move is just another example of Musk's desperation to sway the Wisconsin Supreme Court election, which, according to him, will determine the "entire destiny of humanity" (no pressure or anything). And, of course, one…
Can Trump Serve a Third Term? Please God No, Not According to the Constitution (and Also Our Sanity)
Let's get this straight - Donald Trump is not going to be president again, and yet, here we are, talking about the possibility of him running for a third term in 2028, because, of course, Steve Bannon is a troll, and trolling is what trolls do best. But, I mean, come on, people, don't be ridiculous, the Constitution is pretty clear about this whole thing - the 22nd Amendment says no person can be elected…
Schumer’s Master Plan: Alienating Millennials with His Denture-Like Grip on Progress
I am just so done with the Democratic Party and their wishy-washy approach to, well, everything. It's like, come on guys, can't you just pick a side and stick to it? I mean, I'm not asking for perfection, but a little bit of courage and empathy would be nice. But no, instead we get watered-down climate policies and half-measures on student debt and health care. It's like, hello, don't you know that we're facing existential…
White House Suddenly Discovers ‘Conflict of Interest’ in Investigation of Guy Who Gave Them Lots of Money
I am just so done with the latest news about a Los Angeles-based federal prosecutor getting fired by the White House, allegedly because he was involved in a case against one of Trump's top donors - you can read more about it on the Los Angeles Times website. And let's be real, this is not the first time we've seen something like this happen, but what's really got my goat is that the prosecutor, Adam…
Marjorie Taylor Greene Loses Mind, Forgets She’s a Politician, Not a Hallmark Card, Scolds AOC for Not Being Married Off to a Suitable Bachelor by Now
Let's get real here, the whole concept of cookies and online tracking is like that one aunt at the family reunion - it just won't leave you alone. And I'm not even kidding, have you seen the list of cookies that websites use to track your every move? It's like they're trying to win some kind of bet on who can collect the most information about you. I mean, _fbp, kuid, bkdc, and IDE are…
Trump Declares Signal Leak Story ‘So Last Season,’ Demands Media Focus on His Latest Hairpiece Malfunction Instead
And let's get this straight, folks, Trump's latest rant about the Signal leak story being "old and boring" is just, well, rich (no pun intended). But seriously, who does he think he's fooling with this kind of rhetoric? I mean, come on, the guy's been in office for what, four years now, and he still can't seem to grasp the concept of transparency. But I digress, the real issue at hand is the Signal leak…
Trump Reveals Top Secret Plan to Become President for Life: ‘I’ll Just Refuse to Leave, Believe Me, It’s Gonna Be Huge’
You've got to be kidding me, right? President Donald Trump is actually considering a third term in the White House, because, you know, the Constitution is just a suggestion, not a rule book. And, of course, he's "not joking" about it, because that's exactly what he says every time he's about to do something completely absurd. I mean, who needs a two-term limit when you're a visionary leader like Trump? But, I mean, seriously, have…
Opinion | Democrats, Insult Them Like a Pro: A Beginner’s Guide to Elegant Trash Talk
Let's get real here, Tim Walz calling Elon Musk a "South African nepo baby" is just the tip of the iceberg - and I'm not even sure if that's a bad thing, I mean, have you seen South African cuisine? But, I digress. And, can we talk about how DOGE is just a fancy name for a cryptocurrency that's almost as volatile as Elon Musk's Twitter feed? But, what's really going on here is that…
Shockingly, One in Five Americans Want to Ditch Their Student Loans, Reality TV, and Politicians and Move to Canada: Who Can Blame Them?
Escalating tensions between the United States and Canada - because, you know, we didn't have enough drama already. And then, out of nowhere, a new poll reveals that 20 percent of Americans want their state to secede from the union and join Canada - I mean, who wouldn't want to escape this chaos, right? But, and this is a big but, have you seen the map of states most likely to secede? It's like a…