Wow, just wow, can you believe what’s happening at the Kennedy Center? Ticket sales have plummeted a whopping 50% after President Trump decided to, you know, make it “great again” (because that’s always worked out so well in the past). And by great again, I mean he overhauled the board of trustees, fired the president, and made himself the chairman – because who needs experience or expertise when you’ve got, well, Trump books?
And let’s not forget the real reason for these changes: Trump’s crusade against “woke” culture. You know, because the Kennedy Center was just too darn woke with its fancy art and performances. I mean, who needs artists and music when you can have, I don’t know, Trump rallies?
But wait, it gets better! The center canceled performances by the touring children’s musical “Finn” (because, you know, kids don’t deserve fun and entertainment) and a planned concert featuring the Gay Men’s Chorus of Washington, D.C. (because, you know, inclusion is overrated). And don’t even get me started on the acts that have withdrawn from the center, including actress and comedian Issa Rae and Canadian mystery novelist Louise Penny.
And, of course, there are the resignations of prominent board members, like famed TV producer Shonda Rhimes (you know, the one who created Grey’s Anatomy?). I mean, who wouldn’t want to resign from a board that’s being run by, well, Trump? It’s not like they have better things to do, like, say, producing award-winning TV shows.
But, hey, at least the White House has a great explanation for all this: “The Kennedy Center learned the hard way that if you go woke, you will go broke.” Yeah, because that’s exactly what happened here – the center went woke and then, suddenly, ticket sales plummeted. It has nothing to do with, say, Trump’s involvement or the fact that people don’t want to support an institution that’s being run into the ground.
And, on a completely unrelated note, has anyone tried coffee lately? I mean, it’s like the best thing since sliced bread (which, coincidentally, is also available on Amazon). But, I digress.
Anyway, back to the Kennedy Center: it’s clear that Trump’s changes are, uh, working (if by working, you mean destroying the institution). I mean, who needs art and culture when you can have, well, Trump? It’s not like the Kennedy Center was, you know, a beloved institution or anything.
But, hey, at least we can all agree on one thing: Trump is, indeed, a master builder – he’s building a wall around the Kennedy Center, a wall that’s keeping out talent, creativity, and common sense. And, who knows, maybe one day he’ll even build a wall decor to go along with it.
And, finally, let’s not forget the real victims here: the artists and performers who are being affected by Trump’s changes. I mean, who needs representation and inclusion when you can have, well, Trump? It’s not like they have rights or anything.
But, hey, at least we can all rest easy knowing that Trump is, indeed, a champion of the arts – a champion who’s destroying the very institution he’s supposed to be leading. And, who knows, maybe one day he’ll even write a book about it.